It has been 3 years this September since my beloved husband has died. This journey of widowhood, a new and foreign landscape I am learning to traverse. It has been nature that has nurtured me back from the rawness of having my life upended and has grounded my feet to the earth to once again walk a good red road.
I was gifted a year ago with a monarch caterpillar in a clear plastic container with some milkweed (it’s the only plant the caterpillars will eat). I got to witness that caterpillar transform itself to a chrysalis and then eventually emerge as a beautiful monarch butterfly. So inspired and awed by this amazing miracle of nature I planted milkweed in my garden in the hope monarchs would come and dance in my milkweed patch.
Watching them alight on the milkweed and dance on my flowers brought me great joy, jumping and whooping like a five year old when I discovered an egg. I had great fun setting up the “monarch farm”, more plastic containers to hold their precious cargo until it was time for them to emerge and move on.
In Native American traditions butterfly medicine is symbolic of change, joy and color, and often represents transformation, transmutation and the “dance of joy”. For me, watching the butterflies reminded me that life is a dance and dance brings back the sweetness of life. And I too am learning the “dance of joy” from the butterflies, realizing that my broken heart is being mended little by little. And like the butterfly, my grief moves through stages, shifting and transmuting, but always there never letting me forget. But a little less each day, grief transmuted in a way I can live with.
Butterfly medicine shows us what stage in the cycle we are in. By understanding where you are in the cycle you can figure out what to do next. I have found these questions helpful as I navigate through widowhood, emerging into my new life.
I was gifted a year ago with a monarch caterpillar in a clear plastic container with some milkweed (it’s the only plant the caterpillars will eat). I got to witness that caterpillar transform itself to a chrysalis and then eventually emerge as a beautiful monarch butterfly. So inspired and awed by this amazing miracle of nature I planted milkweed in my garden in the hope monarchs would come and dance in my milkweed patch.
Watching them alight on the milkweed and dance on my flowers brought me great joy, jumping and whooping like a five year old when I discovered an egg. I had great fun setting up the “monarch farm”, more plastic containers to hold their precious cargo until it was time for them to emerge and move on.
In Native American traditions butterfly medicine is symbolic of change, joy and color, and often represents transformation, transmutation and the “dance of joy”. For me, watching the butterflies reminded me that life is a dance and dance brings back the sweetness of life. And I too am learning the “dance of joy” from the butterflies, realizing that my broken heart is being mended little by little. And like the butterfly, my grief moves through stages, shifting and transmuting, but always there never letting me forget. But a little less each day, grief transmuted in a way I can live with.
Butterfly medicine shows us what stage in the cycle we are in. By understanding where you are in the cycle you can figure out what to do next. I have found these questions helpful as I navigate through widowhood, emerging into my new life.
- Is this the egg stage: Is it just a thought or an idea? What is my desired outcome?
- Is this the larva stage: How can I accomplish my outcome? Do I need to make a decision?
- Is this the cocoon stage: Am I developing and doing something to make my idea a reality?
- Is this the birth stage: Am I sharing my completed idea?